It is not obligatory to pay the
agreed amount of mahr before consummation of marriage. Mahr can be paid at the
time of nikāḥ. The amount paid at the time of nikāḥ is termed ghayr mu’ajjal
while the part left over to be paid within a determined time period is termed
Nikāḥ renders both of you legally
husband and wife. This entails two things. First, you both have legal right to
live together and can establish marital relationship. Second, you both have some
responsibilities towards each another.
The responsibilities on the part of the
husband include the protection and complete financial support to the wife. It
also includes his being responsible of the offspring both will have.
The marital relationship in the present
situation cannot be objected to on the legal grounds. But social norms would not
accept this. If the society comes to know this kind of relationship between you
both prior to the time your wife moves with you and you openly start living as a
husband and wife, they would not welcome it. It will cause a huge fall in your
and your wife’s repute. Please note that it is in fact recognition by the
society which makes your relationship acceptable. And it is only the society
that makes sure that any of the party does not neglect the duties entailed by
the union. If a couple has sexual relationship prior to rukhsati and the woman
gets pregnant, it would harm her repute.
I would suggest you should not think of
consummating your marriage. However, there is no restriction on your meeting
with her as any two believing Muslim and Muslimah can. You should try to bring
your wife over as soon as possible. You both can talk your elders into doing
that very soon.