Many a time, we
end up being selfish and self-centered. Seldom do we look
beyond our needs and interests and seldom do the needs and
plight of others bother us. Living for others is now the motto
of only a few noble souls. We fail to realize that while
selfishness keeps the mind under constant pressure,
selflessness keeps it serene.
Instances of our
selfishness are at times subtle and at times blatant. We are
selfish when we do not give time to our children, our parents
and our loved ones; we are also selfish when we do not shower
praises our contemporaries deserve; not solving the problems
of others when we very well can also falls in this ambit; not
spending on the needy for fear of ending up poor is also a
selfish act; we are selfish when we do not realize that a
wedding function or festivity might bother our neighbours; we
are also selfish in not making du‘a for others as much and as
frequently as we can; a thing as small as smiling to make
someone’s day too at times does not cross our mind.
Selfishness, it
seems, is deeply ingrained in us and we need a constant effort
to get the better of it. Perhaps the starting point to combat
it is to start with not so difficult a task: we can begin by
just looking around our house to find things which will never
be needed by us and which are totally redundant. Experience
shows that if one looks with such an eye, one ends up with
loads and loads of such things. Parting ways with them should
not be very difficult as these things have little or no use
for us in the first place.
Some of the
following tips may help us further in this effort:
1. We should
stop taking credit for good deeds we do, and in fact hide
these deeds from others thinking that God knows them and He
will duly reward us.
2. We should
take up some voluntary work and try to spend time, effort and
our skills for others.
3. We should
save money every month specially to use it for the welfare of
the needy. This money should be over and above the zakah
amount.
4. Reading
inspirational stories of selfless people and spending time in
their company if one is lucky enough to have them around helps
a lot.
5. A selfish
motive may be of help here: We can forget our own pain if we
become selfless. When we live and work for others, it makes us
see how better off we are than so many others and this makes
us thankful and satisfied souls.
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